Oct. 17th Horoscope

From The Village Voice, Free Will Astrology for the week of Oct. 15th thru 22nd.

An ounce of pretension, is worth a pound of bull shit.

By Rob Brezsny: PISCES [February 19–March 20] In medieval Europe, more resources and human ingenuity were lavished upon cathedrals and churches than on any other buildings. In the last hundred years, the emphasis has been different, having switched to the towering structures that house institutions dedicated to commerce. By that measure, Money is a far more important God than God. I invite you, Pisces, to buck the modern trend. See if you can devote at least 1 more percent of your energy and intelligence to matters of the spirit and soul than to the demands of the material realm. I suspect you'll find, ironically, that this will lead to an increase of your mastery over the material realm.

You a know a horoscope is trouble when Medieval Europe is mentioned in the first sentence. When I think of Medieval Europe, my mind wanders to those twinks who are really into King Dick's Faire and the SCA.

For those of you who are too lazy to click on the link, here's the abbreviated Julia version of the SCA: These are folks who divide the planet up into kingdoms and have mock battles a la any olde tyme war where there was armor, mud, armored-covered horses, Robert the Bruce, serving wenches, mead and wooden catapults. They give themselves names like Lord Duckworth of Gaul and have tournaments where they have duels with swords made out of duct-tape, peg board and corncobs. (I made up the corncob part, but wouldn't that be a cool weapon?)

Oh, and they go around speaking in the King's English ALL THE TIME. "Would ye like a mug of mead?" Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!
So, after seeing Medieval Europe mentioned, well, I 'shut it down' and not in the Rachel Zoe kinda way.

"In the last hundred years, the emphasis has been different, having switched to the towering structures that house institutions dedicated to commerce."
Zzzzz..Mr. Brezsny knows his history. Well, shit howdy. But, I would like to see that part stitched on a pillow somewhere because that would be a good gift for a capitalist. Or for Hank Paulson.

Then, I reached this part: "... Money is a far more important God than God."
Hallelujah! Sounds like a good mantra for me to live by these days! It seems like you can't reach God these days unless you have money so it's good to know that money is ultimately, well... you get the idea.

"I invite you, Pisces, to buck the modern trend."
The modern trend is being bucked by this broke-ass Pisces, so there's no need to invite me along.

As for this part, why bother? "See if you can devote at least 1 more percent of your energy and intelligence to matters of the spirit and soul than to the demands of the material realm."
I definitely don't live in the material realm like many of them fancy big city mice, so I'm going to take that remaining 1 more percent of my energy and intelligence to watching movies on my eyelids, and by letting the dust bunnies in my living room roam free instead of living a caged life inside a Dyson canister.

Who really cares what happened in Medieval Europe? I certainly don't. It's hard enough keeping up with modern times why would anyone start out a horoscope with what was going on during the plague years? Just tell me what's happening with my stars for that day and I won't feel the need to hogtie you and force you to watching hours and hours of Charles in Charge and Gimme A Break! to get you to lighten up.