I guess this is a typical phase for a woman my age to go through, however.
While most of my ilk do things like get plastic surgery or dump their husbands for Caleb, their son's college roommate, I work part-time as a copy editor for a trade pub and applaud myself for not needing the Botox needle--at least for another 10 years or so. Chalk it up to the lead blanket I wear as my daily sunscreen and the copious amounts of water I drink daily. Yes, my skin looks good, but that's just not enough.
But, something was missing: a physical challenge. I've been a fan of Bikram yoga for years. I discovered it about 12 years ago in LA and took classes from time to time. When I moved to the city, I got back into it but it wasn't easy since I was older and not as physically strong as I was back in the days of yore. So, I'm working towards doing 100 classes, but not consecutively since work and Bikram Yoga Andersonville's schedule are not conducive to me doing 100 classes in 100 days. Not at the moment, anyway.
My plan is write about each class and the adventures both pre- and post-class. Most days will probably be dull, but I'm hoping for some excitement from time to time.
Like today, for example.
Day 1. July 18.
These pleasant late-winter days have brought many folks out and about on North Clark street in Andersonville. As a result, the sidewalks are packed with errand runners, outside cafe patrons, and people just strolling down the street. This makes sidewalk navigation difficult. At one point, I had to pass this slow-moving gay couple who took up most of the sidewalk with their little dogs and width-of-the-sidewalk handholding. And, as I passed them, my large yoga bag accidently brushed up against one of the young men's arms. I profusely apologized, saying that my bag was too large for crowds. With that, the Kate Gosselin-coiffed one said somewhat sotto voce, "Well, not only is her bag large, but so is her ass." Fortunately, I have dog hearing and after he uttered those snippy words, I turned on my heel and said, "You know, for a segment of the population that is screaming for more tolerance and respect, you certainly don't practice what you so loudly preach. Asshole." At last glance, he was desperately trying pick up his jaw and dignity off of the ground.
When I arrived at the studio, I was pretty lit up from my confrontation with those two pissy queens, but, I quickly got over it after I secured my spot in the 100 degree room and got into my Savasana or Dead Pose (that's not me in the picture). It's not as easy as one would think because you have to shift your breathing from the in-through-the-nose-and-out-through-the-mouth method to in-through-the-nose-and-out-through-the-nose method. Try it, in the heat, without moving at all. All I can say is good luck!
As we progressed through the 26 poses, I had major issues with only two. This Head to Knee Pose, also known as Dandayamana - JanuShirasana. Notice that both knees are locked-out solid. You're not in that pose if either knee is bent even slightly. The other looks easy, but um, no it's not. Ardha Chandrasana with Pada-Hastasana, or Half Moon Pose, is meant to stretch you from the inside out while maintaining an even breath, tight muscles and straight legs. It's super fun especially when I was about to pass out, and it was only pose number two. Oh, and there was one gent directly in front of me who almost showed me a full-moon pose. Not something I wanted to see on an empty stomach or from someone with whom I am not intimate.
When class was finished, I moseyed on into the locker room and made the mistake of asking one of my fellow classmates the name of the instructor. Here's her response: "Um, I am not into making friends in this class..." To which I replied, "Tell me something, where in that question did I state that I wanted to be your BFF? Please, I'd like to know if I need to work on my subliminal language skills." (See, I was still reeling from the pissy queen encounter--all of that sweating, stretching and mooning did shit for my inner-yogini.) Wide-eyed, she responded, "Oh, I don't know." Smiling, I said, "That's all you needed to say."
With that, I changed out of sweaty t-shirt and limped out of the studio.
The instructor's name is Navette, by the way. And, I didn't have to be anyone's BFF to get that information.
